week 37 almost two months old

well folks its been a very stressful week. I have been a very worried mama. My little baby hasn't had a good week. We started off the week with his first bath. He wasn't sure what to think about it. He was a little worried and stressed for a minute. Then he realized he liked it. It was pretty cute.
Monday was when all the stressed started. We had a swallow study and things looked good at first. But then the trouble started when poor ryker got tired he started to aspirate fluid into his lungs and nose. This means no oral feedings for now. His lungs are inflamed and nose is all clogged due to this problem. He has struggled so much with breathing this week. I have been sad for him. He has had an awful week. At least he doesn't have an infection. Ryker is back on high flow oxygen to help his lungs and nose. He has been a lot more fussy and not sleeping as deep. The doctors are in a wait and see time frame. On Tuesday his breathing was so bad that we had to hold him up during every feeding for an hour and a half. pretty silly I thought. But I did it. Even grandma came to help hold him up at night time. Which pretty much pooped her out.  On Wednesday, I came in to find that poor little man's feet were so swollen and purple. I had the doctors take the holding up away and he seems to be breathing just fine. Well the doctors and I talked about feedings and what to do. The decision is a stomach feeding tube. He will have surgery the next couple of weeks to get it placed in his stomach. They are hopefully he will be able to eat normal, but right now he can't. So here we are another step forward. More stress for home and a little sad, but in his blessing he was promised to eat normal. I hold onto that. It might take a while, but he will get there. We are just waiting for his lungs to heal to get the tube in place. Then he can come home. Just a couple more weeks. I can handle it. I can't wait to get out of this place. And remind me never to have a premature baby again. It's hard work and very stressful!

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday

So as you all notice my posts are getting shorter and spread out. Day to day change not much happening. Still trying to learn how to eat. I went to Idaho for a couple of days for a doctor's appointment and I come back to hear my baby is starting to take a bottle. The last couple of days he eats about hour of his bottle then he is sleepy to finish.  He is trying at least. He keeps gaining weight. The weight today is 5lbs. FINALLY!!! I was also told today he had a great exam appointment. His eyes are almost fully developed and soon he won't be just seeing shadows. Yea! But on the down side. Because he is struggling with eating, the doctors think he might have a swallowing problem. Instead of the food going down his esophagus it could be going down is trechea. We are doing a swallow study on Monday. If that is the case, we will have to thicken up the milk so it's easier to  swallow properly. This experience is like a roller coaster. Up and down and up and down. One good thing then a not so good thing. Ryker's due date is n three weeks, at this rate he won't be home until after that date.  But the up side, he is getting off his high flow oxygen. Back to normal flow and 1/2 liter.  Let's pray he does good on it. Come on Ryker, I know you love the hospital, but your mom wants to go home.

Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday....Enjoy!!!

This has been a busy,stressful, timely, and exciting week.  On Thursday Ryker's little lungs collapsed. It was pretty scary. Thankfully I wasn't there. I would have been freaking out.The doctors just told me its because his lungs need to mature a little more. So that was the stress for the week.
Busy and timely, well its been both with breast feeding this week. I have felt frustrated with breast feeding. I know I am suppose to have the motherly breast feeding instinct and babies are suppose to have it as well. But for some reason Ryker and I just haven't figured it out. I was almost to the point of trying bottle feeding, until today. Today was the day!!!! We figured it out. I was so excited the nurses wanted to know what was going on. I am so proud of us. I hope tomorrow will be just as successful. Now we need him to tolerate volume.
On another note,, my  wonderful family through me a baby shower. It was a great day on Saturday. Lots of food and awesome baby stuff for Ryker. It was fun. Now for today's weight.... The numbers are in 4 lbs 10 ounces.. At this rate he will be 5lbs by next weekend... Here are the updated pictures as promised.

wow! its been almost a week

Ryker is progressing, but slowly. This week he has gained a lot. He is now 4lbs 4 ounces. Steady weight is a great thing. A couple of days ago we got Ryker's discharge goals. Eat everything by mouth and breath without oxygen. Two more to go. I am praying he gets the breast feeding this week. He was getting it, then he had a too much milk scare. Now he is so scared to try again. So this week I am working with OT to help Ryker feel comfortable. Here is the little man... I think he looks like a little eskimo.